I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
