dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
17 year olds will be the death of me.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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