And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
