No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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