she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
