office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
