Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
