Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
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