Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Randomize
