Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
