I think i peed on brittanys purse
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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