And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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