you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
The uberlube is also flammable
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize