I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
How does one acquire holy water?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
