Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
