I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
