fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
