We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
