there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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