I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
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