Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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