summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
