yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
