Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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