Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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