i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Still dying that you shit outside
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Randomize
