I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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