I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
