hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
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