I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
