i need an iv and a liver transplant
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
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