4 words: hood of his car
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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