I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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