I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
