she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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