At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
