it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
FUCK WHALES
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
