Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
