the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Can I color on your dick again?
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
my poor anus
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
