Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
