Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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