well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Randomize
