I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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