Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
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