his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize