Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
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