The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
She bit a glass in half.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
