Nicole vs. Life
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
