If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
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