someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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