I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
